Week 6!!

Hey, the shows are back and so are we. Of course, new shows are only half the week, so we totally half-assed our end too. Although, we dare you to tell any difference in quality. We bet you can’t. Well, this intro might be a little shorter, but otherwise, same old, same old. Anyways, continue on for the meat in the Late Night Thing Meat Parade:

Monday:

• The Tonight Show With Jay Leno - Justin Timberlake, Masi Oka, Matisyahu
• The Late Show with David Letterman - Jim Carrey, Alanis Morissette (R 12/16/99)
• Late Night with Conan O’Brien - Pre-empted for NYE
• The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson - Dr. Drew Pinsky, Bob Spitz (R 1/2/06)
• Jimmy Kimmel Live - Pre-empted for NYE

STEPHAN: If this was a real holiday I’d feel bad about still writing this, instead of doing something super important like getting pregnant in an alley or something (Sparks just tastes so good, I can’t help myself). However, it’s not a holiday, it’s just arbitrary and stupid and I hope everyone gets hit by a drunk driver.

I don’t really have anything to say about any of this TV nonsense either. Wednesday is going to be great however. 2 months worth of waiting great? Let’s hope so.

ERECH: New Years eve, and we’re still here giving you the lowdown on the good late night telly - we’re champs Stephan and I. Yes we are.

So assuming you aren’t out drinking and driving like you’re supposed to be (ONE CAN ONLY HOPE), I’d say Skip Conan and Jimmy tonight, and stick with Dave - it’s an exceptionally old rerun, from a time before Jim Carrey had fully burnt all his bridges into my heart - and Alanis was still mildly relevant then too! That’s right, Dave is giving us a looking glass into the way things were, oh America, what went wrong?

Tuesday:

• The Tonight Show With Jay Leno - Will Ferrell, Vince Young, Flipsyde
• The Late Show with David Letterman - George Clooney, the Decemberists (R 11/28/06)
• Late Night with Conan O’Brien - Will Arnett, Terri Crews, Patti Scialfa (R 9/6/07)
• The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson - Famke Janssen, Jami Gertz, Chris Botti & Paula Cole (R 10/14/04)
• Jimmy Kimmel Live - Don Cheadle, Zac Efron, Editors (R 7/25/07)

ERECH: Conan and Gob are always good watchin’, even if I’ve seen this episode like 3 times now.

According to the date on this Fake Craiggers ep, this took place during that period after Kilborne left, and when the show still didn’t have an official host, as they were still trying out the various nominees to see who sucked the least. Honestly, I was pulling for Aisha Tyler - but Fake Craiggers has actually finally grown on me - all of 3+ years later. His show isn’t very typical of current fare, as he seems to be trying to pull away from that sort of faux-sincerity so many of the other nighties give off - it’s quite madly obvious Craiggers wants to be here and loves that his show works now as much as we are all surprised and delighted it does. And that’s neat. None of that Conze nightly assault of pretending he’s a buffoon. None of the Jay Leno “Hey how ya doin’??” Catskills act either. And certainly none of that dressing up a pig and hoping he doesn’t say dirty words every night, like we get with “Yimmy”. Nope, Craiggers needs this gig really, and I think he honestly wants to experiment with the format as much as he can, much in the same way Jon Stewart did with his show, before that got canned and he moved on to greener grasses. Now if only Ferguson can start pulling a better palette of guests (ahem Craig, if you need a new booking agent, give me a call…), his show might really be something in OH EIGHT.

Go get em Fake Craiggers!

STEPHAN: Aisha Tyler? Really? She’s been good exactly once (in that Nip/Tuck issue episode where we learned that female circumcision [I didn't even know women had penises to get mutilated until I saw that episode.] is awful and she and her accent cried a lot, but then had an orgasm). I was pulling for Michael Ian Black, but I think Ferguson has been pretty good. He’s occasionally a little hackier than I would prefer, but he’s definitely grown into an actual host.

Flipsyde is lucky the internet exists because there’s no way anybody is buying anything (CD, t-shirt, concert ticket, whatever) with the word “Flipsyde” on it in person. Unless they’ve lost some sort of bet, but how often does that happen?

Wednesday:

• The Tonight Show With Jay Leno - Gov. Mike Huckabee, Emeril Lagasse, Chingy
• The Late Show with David Letterman - Robin Williams, Lupe Fiasco, Hillary Clinton
• Late Night with Conan O’Brien - Bob Saget, Dwayne Perkins, Robert Gordon & Chris Spedding
• The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson - NO GUESTS
• Jimmy Kimmel Live - Andy Dick, Helio Castroneves, Kid Rock

STEPHAN: I’m confused that 2 months off leads to Robin Williams and Bob Saget getting to be on TV. Are those episodes left over from the last strike?

Speaking of the strike, why did the WGA pick November? AMPTP clearly is in no rush to settle anything, they had a million reality shows and half seasons of never-aired shows to do just fine this spring. The writers on the other hand have all had to go through the holidays without any income and now we’re two months into the strike and they have to worry about their mortgages while the AMPTP members are still trying to sweat them out. If this was a fair negotiation, clearly the writer’s would get a piece of the internet and more DVD revenues, but fair is obviously not what’s happening and I’m not sure why anyone thought it would happen. I don’t know any rich people who got rich by being nice or fair.

ERECH: And here we are. Back. Strong. Lean. Ready.

Clearly Dave is going to be the guy to beat tonight, and he’s going to be the WGA’s greatest ally on the airwaves from now until when the strike does end. Worldwide Pants deal was a terrible blow to the showing of other productions companies who have yet to do so, or worse, don’t want to - for shame other companies, for shame. Letterman is friend to the working man, to the comedian, to the writers and creators, and this “up yours” move on his part just so clearly defines his pure and utter hatred for most of Hollywood and it’s machinations, and especially to his own Network, CBS - I mean, you have to remember why he is at CBS to begin with, because the suits at NBC stuck their nose in and ruined the mans destiny. So it’s nice to see Dave finally be able to really give them all a big juicy middle finger, and this time have it mean something.

Conan too, back, however without writers and the same cache Dave will pull, is going to be a huge friend to the WGA on the airs as well. Conan is heir apparent to Late Night, with Jay effectively being forced out next year and Dave surely soon to retire within the next 5 or so years (sad face), which will give him the sorta uppity, mouthy leeway to voice his total support for the WGA nightly, despite the fact his handlers at NBC may be less than thrilled of his doing so.

Jay on the other hand, I’m sure will mostly tow the line. The fact he has Mike Huckabee on the night before Iowa, and has already announced he will be writing SOME material on his show himself, is just going to be embarrassing and insulting to all regarding this. Boo.

And Fake Craiggers with NO guests tonight? Scroll back up to what I said Tuesday night about him experimenting with his show, yeah? Should be interesting for sure.

Thursday:

• The Tonight Show With Jay Leno - Howie Mandel, Jason Lewis, Joe Nichols
• The Late Show with David Letterman - Bill Maher, Ellen Page, “Young Frankenstein” cast
• Late Night with Conan O’Brien - Megan Mullally, Fonzworth Bentley, Kid Rock
• The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson - Dominic Monaghan, Jason Randal
• Jimmy Kimmel Live - Rev. Al Sharpton, Rich Eisen, Two Gallants

ERECH: So we’re into Day 2 of new Late Night, and well… we waited 2 months for this? Bill Maher should be dishing hard against networks and their greed, what with his affair with ABC - but he’s just probably going to be shilling the return of his HBO show, the coward. Howie Mandel? Really? And Fonzworth Bentley might be a favorite on The Zone, but for me he’s worthless and overly obnoxious, and I’m about 90% sure he doesn’t realize he’s not the next Kanye but just a better dressed Flavor Flav, pointy head and all.

Still might be some gems tonight, but I’m steering well clear of Yimmy and Leno, and I’d advise you do the same.

STEPHAN: Ellen Page used to be the best actor on the Trailer Park Boys and she was only 13. Since then she’s been good in lots of terrible stuff (I’m looking at you, Juno). I think a talk with Dave will help her get her career back on track. She kinda looks like that swimmer in Cabin Boy, maybe she can star in the remake.

By the way, did Kid Rock do something recently? Why is he anywhere near TV, let alone on Conan? Will no actual musicians cross the WGA picket line or something, so we have to settle for him singing? Speaking of Kid Rock, if you haven’t been listening to the Best Show on WFMU, go seek out the one where Paul F. Tompkins was in studio. I think it was in November. Tom and Paul break down a Rolling Stone piece on everyone’s favorite Detroit Cowboy with tremendous results.

Friday:

• The Tonight Show With Jay Leno - Jarod Miller, John Caparulo, Blake Lewis
• The Late Show with David Letterman - Donald Trump, Shooter Jennings
• Late Night with Conan O’Brien - Bill Maher, Jim Cramer, Mike DeStefano
• The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson - Leonard Nimoy, Lyle Lovett, Dean Edwards
• Jimmy Kimmel Live - Ice Cube, Carrie Ann Inaba, Xavier Rudd

STEPHAN: Jim Cramer and Jarod Miller is good TV, even if there are no writers around. I’ve said it before, but I don’t know anything about money, I don’t have any, I doubt I ever will, and yet Jim Cramer (who only talks about money, well, and occasionally about Philly) is still absolutely compelling. His CNBC show is great, even if it just helps you have opinions when your rich friends have a cocktail party.

I looked up Shooter Jennings on the tubes and he had kid with that chick from The Sopranos (the one that’s gone on to do nothing else). Also, his dad was famous. That’s going to be a winner of a performance.

ERECH: I’m mildly curious about Ice Cube on Yimmy tonight, if only because it’s always so sad for me to see who this guy has turned into, washed up and protruding, from the vigilant and sharp voice of American youth he was 15 years ago. HOWEVER, I do kinda want to see his and Morgan’s new movie, Church Friday - and that’s the first time I’ve been able to say that about any Cube movie since Three Kings, so there you go. Oh Oshea, what happened?

Letterman and Trump should be fun, but I have no idea who Shooter Jennings is, even after I found him on both Google AND Wikipedia.

I’ll echo what Stephan said, Cramer on The Zone is always good watchins.

And finally, as a (once and future) Seattleite, I have to apologize (again) to the world for Blake Lewis. The rest of us, we’re not like him, and I’m sorry you all have to know who he is now. Truly I am.

And that kids, is another week of LNT. Be back on Monday when we hopefully have next weeks schedule all figured out and then make fun of it. See you then!

Read Past LNT’s:
Week 5
Week 4
Week 3
Week 2
Week 1